In To The Light

By Susannah Laing

What an incredible day. To be one of the four women Greer asked to paint to tell our story was probably more emotional than I thought. The show was about 4 different woman coming ‘into the light’.

My story is the transformation /recovery from bulimia, self harm. 

A lady asked me ‘how does it feel to see me there and know what my body has been through to get here?’

– – my eyes started watering and I felt that weird choking you get- that catches you by suprise – she smiled softly and said ‘no one’s asked you that yet.’

 I forget the years of torture and the safety I found in the toilet bowl. How i would hurt myself anyway I could to numb emotional pain. 

But I also can’t express the hard work and pain it was to rebuild and change my life. Because this changes everything – EVERYTHING. Friends, Family, Work, Sleep, Food, Boundaries, Responsibilities. 

I think that’s why many stay on a perpetual cycle at times of yo yo diets, exercise, or alcohol. 

To do things for the rest of your life changes EVERYTHING – it’s not a lent or a sober october. It’s the rest of your life.

How do i feel? 

I feel really bloody proud.

yeah i think that’s what i think.  And I don’t think i’ve ever said that. And it makes me cry. But everything is worth it because life is alive and sore and beautiful and scary and enlightening and unfair and surprising! but above all You come home to yourself.

Of course It’s still hard – but nothing was harder than being where I was and not many of us get second chances. If you do – run with it- do the recovery and it may take years but it’s worth it ❤️

Thank you @greerralston for reminding me of this. Strength and vulnerability are friends and work together magically. All those wonderful women had all of that. We were in great hands ❤️



#artist #wellbeing #bulimiarecovery #recovery #artwork #eatingdisorders

“In To The Light ” exhibition at City Contemporary Art Gallery in Perth from June 11th – July 12th.

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